what a friend we have in Jesus...

The other night in church we sang the old hymn, what a friend we have in Jesus. This song is just stuck in my head now- Kathryn Scott has a champion version on one of her albums. Its such a simple reflection of a pure love. But these things, (simple reflection and pure love) are not the norm. We make it so hard- so difficult. In some ways it's a song I criticize with my own Christianity. I mean, All our sins and griefs to bear, what a privilege to carry everything in prayer? I guarantee that my prayers are sometimes not privileged. My prayers admit to my failures, they admit to my lack. I have trials and temptations- there is trouble everywhere, my pain is needless? Is my pain not what drives me to rescue the perishing? My pain is my biggest joy. My joy is my biggest pain. What a flipping oxy-moron! My pain that others don't know Him, is also my biggest JOY- I have Him. My most heartfelt sorrow is that He is not the 'found friend' to some of my best friends. I struggle with this song, yet I find Him in it. This good wrestle reminds me of someone else who got their hip knocked out of place, I wrestle because I wont leave my civilized Christianity alone. I wont leave until I am changed. It's like what Erwin McManus says in His book The Barbarian Way, If Jesus would not avoid the 'place of the skull', then we should not be surprised where He might lead us. If even He found himself sweating blood at Gethsemane, then we should be certain we will stand in crisis moments where all we can do after asking for relief is declare, ' Not my will will, but yours.' I want to live fully alive. No more self Help Christianity, Im sooooo done with all that. If it means standing buck naked in the wilderness, eating locusts and honey, having my head chopped off, being chased out of churches, being chased out of my home, being tortured in prison. ALL FOR THE SAKE OF CHRIST?  Count me in.